Friday, January 29, 2010

On the Useless Appendage Known as the Pro Bowl

I agree with pretty much everything Posnanski says here: I think the Pro Bowl is an unsalavageable idea. I'd prefer to see it replaced by one of the following:

A.) A footrace between the five fastest players in the league, Usain Bolt, a horse, and a jet-powered Segway.

B.) Same as above, except held in a pool. Replace Usain Bolt with Michael Phelps, the horse with a German Shepherd, and the Segway with a torpedo.

C.) A formal debate contest between NFL quarterbacks.

D.) A series of boxing matches between NFL coaches, organized by weight. (Tell me Rex Ryan v. Andy Reid wouldn't lend new life to the heavyweight division.)

E.) A psychiatric evaluation of Jerry Jones, hosted by Dr. Ruth Westheimer.

F.) An Apprentice-style reality show in which a league source generates a fake "scoop," and an elite group of NFL beat reporters attempt to break the news. (My money's on Schefter.)

G.) Jared Allen wrestling a blindfolded bear.

1 comment:

WarningTrack said...

C.) A formal debate contest between NFL quarterbacks.

I like the possibilities here. Brett Favre can defend the solvency of Social Security and Derek Anderson can advocate an extension of unemployment benefits.


G.) Jared Allen wrestling a blindfolded bear.

We would have to shave one of them to tell them apart.